My dad has asked me over and over again “why did this have to happen to me?” I looked up form our puzzle and said “a wise man once told me we don’t ask why; instead we ask why not me!?” He just stared at me and then smiled. I myself have looked up towards the sky and asked the question; “why my Dad?” In my heart I know we are incredibly lucky, the accident could have been so much worse. Yet my heart wants to ask the lady from Alma “why the fuck weren’t you paying attention? You were in a busy grocery store parking lot. How the fuck didn’t you see Santa Clause walking in front of you. Like how the fuck didn’t you see him!?” These questions will go unanswered. To her my dad is just the “thump” she heard that day.
She got to drive home that day. She got to spend Thanksgiving in her home with her family while my dad spent it in a care center. She gets to Christmas shop and walk this earth freely. She has freedom of movement. She gets to be an active 78 year old woman who goes about her day; while my dad sits and wonders “why did she hit me.” A question he will never get an answer to. Because of the lady from Alma, I heard my dad scream in pain. I had to witness seeing my dad unable to stand and unable to walk. She took my active 66 year old father away from me. She took a piece of my father away that he is fighting tooth and nail to get back.
Every time I go home and turn right on to West Avenue I am reminded of my father. We have to drive by the grocery store in order to get to my parent’s house. The last day my Dad drove was on November 9, 2018. The last time my dad walked freely was on November 9, 2018. Since then he has been wheelchair bound and is struggling to walk. He is struggling to get a piece of his self back, but ya know what, he’s not giving up. No matter how painful it gets he still keeps on trying to walk and for that I am thankful. I am thankful that he refuses to give up. He may be down but he is not out and I have faith that one day I will have my Dad back. That one day we will be hitting the road and exploring new places just like we have done many times before.
Part of me hopes that the lady from Alma thinks about my dad and wonders how he’s doing. I wonder if she feels sorry for running him over. I wonder if she pays more attention in parking lots now or maybe just maybe her family took her keys away. Red Wing is 46 miles from Alma WI and I pray with every fiber of my being that she took those 46 miles to think about what she did.
The lady from Alma changed his life forever and for that I can never forgive her. I can show her grace, but I will never forgive her for the pain she caused.