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{Love} Four years

After Charlie died I thought I was jinxed. I thought that I’d didn’t deserve love or to be happy. I dated a lot, but nothing stuck. It was always the same old boring date with no follow up calls. Some nights I’d just go on a date to get out of the house with the … Continue reading

{Survivorhood} Year Nine

Nine. I can still remember exactly what I was wearing on the day my world broke. Gray cardigan, white button down peasant top, jeans, and cranberry ballet flats. The shoes, I still have them. They are worn and raggedy, I just can’t let them go. Those shoes carried me in the ER and they walked … Continue reading

{Only In MN} Jeffers Petroglyphs

I am always intrigued by those brown “historical marker” signs along the highway. Sometimes they lead me to just a plaque describing a place that once was or sometimes I hit the jackpot and it turns out to be amazing. In early May while driving to Lake Shetek State Park I saw such a sign … Continue reading

{Infertile Me} Operation Transfer Take Home Baby

The moment I have been prepping for is nearly here. All of the injections, blood draws, scans, pills and whatever else I have been through have lead me to this moment. To this very moment motherhood is only one embryo transfer away. It’s strange to think about. I walk in not pregnant and will walk … Continue reading

{Hearts on 22} 8 Borrowed Years

It seems like it was yesterday that I was laying in ICU wondering what my life was going to be like. Would I thrive in my new normal or would I flounder. Would I always see myself as a victim or would I find my survivor shoes and thrive? There were a lot of what … Continue reading

{Infertile Me} Operation Embryo

My stomach looks like I have been brutally punched by multiple elephants. These bruises and I are not strangers, we’ve been here before, except this time I am not fighting for my life. I am fighting for eggs that lord willing will turn into embryos that will turn into our take home baby. I was … Continue reading

{Infertile Me} Ready, Set, IVF!?

I currently have four boxes of generic Lovenox sitting on my kitchen counter. Seeing those boxes brought back a lot of old feelings and memories. This time I am no longer fighting to stay alive, instead I am fighting a battle to get pregnant. Pregnant. Is a word that cuts through me like a knife. … Continue reading

{Cora} 23 years doesn’t heal the heart

23 years ago today I came home from attending a twins game with my fellow school patrol kids. It was our reward for a job well done. I was overly excited about going to the metrodome and getting to go to the big city. Like a normal 11 year old girl would be. I could … Continue reading

{Infertile Me} Femera + Ovidrel = a maybe baby? 

Facebook told me in January/February that 6 of my friends were pregnant. It’s a reminder that I am still standing under my umbrella waiting for the rain to pass. Some women fall pregnant easily and then there are those of us who fight tooth and nail to get pregnant. Part of me is jealous of … Continue reading

{Sophia} Be A Light

Dear Sophia, Auntie was hoping that she would get to share and explain a historic moment to you. You are four and at four you have no idea how close women came to shattering the highest glass ceiling of all. We lost my dear, we lost, our girl Hillary lost. America was not ready for … Continue reading

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