{Infertile Me} With shattered HOPE

Some days I wish I could go back to September 2017 and tell myself not to cling to hope. To tell myself that this journey is going to suck beyond belief. That you will put all of this work in to end up with empty arms, just like you did before. You my dear girl,Continue reading “{Infertile Me} With shattered HOPE”

{Hearts on 22} National Stroke Awareness Month

On October 22, 2009 I almost died five days before my 27th Birthday. I found myself in the ER unable to breath with unbearable chest pain. A CT scan revealed a clot the size of a ten cent gum ball lodged in the valve that connects my left lung to my heart. My oxygen levelContinue reading “{Hearts on 22} National Stroke Awareness Month”

{Life Lessons} Photo of Happiness

Out of all the photos we took in Nebraska Jay loved one the most. To me it was unflattering, I was in the process of deleting it from my phone when Jay said “no that is my favorite photo, it’s so genuine.” You can imagine the look I gave him, I immediately pointed out myContinue reading “{Life Lessons} Photo of Happiness”

{Infertile Me} Emmet James

As the blizzard poured down around me I looked out the window and remembered that the doctor said Snow Pea’s results would be in on Friday. Friday went without word, so I logged in to my online chart, “1 new message” it said. I held my breath, my heart raced, I knew what the messageContinue reading “{Infertile Me} Emmet James”

{Infertile Me} I will always choose you

Right now this loss doesn’t make sense. Going into this I knew I could walk away with empty arms. I pushed that risk down to the bottom and filled my heart with hope. Jay and I had won the battle, with a positive test in hand we beat infertility. My prayers had been answered andContinue reading “{Infertile Me} I will always choose you”

{Go Red} My Father will always be why 

In February we focus on women’s hearts. But this month isn’t just for me, it’s for my Daddy too.  15 years ago I was in college in Ladysmith WI, I called home to talk to my Dad. My sister answered, she said “he’s sleeping.” I pleaded with her to wake him up so I couldContinue reading “{Go Red} My Father will always be why “

{Life Lessons} “I Am So Pretty!” 

Shopping with a four year old is to much fun. I taught Sophia that her size is 5T and if she likes something she needs to find a 5T. It took her only a few minutes to find two dresses and then Auntie helped her find a coordinating pair of leggings for each dress.  LikeContinue reading “{Life Lessons} “I Am So Pretty!” “

{Divorced Life} Standing On The Other Side 

I watched the days tick closer and closer to June 27, to most it’s a regular day, but for me it signifies the beginning. Six years ago today I walked out of my lovely home nestled on a quiet street in Woodbury with my best friend at my side and I never looked back.  TheContinue reading “{Divorced Life} Standing On The Other Side “

{Lucia} A Lifetime of Wonder 

Dearest Lucia, Today Friday May 13th marks your 6th Angel Birthday. It’s hard for mommy to believe that I have spent 6 years without you. There isn’t a day that goes by where mommy doesn’t think of you. Long ago I stopped asking God “why Lucia? Why did God need you more than I didContinue reading “{Lucia} A Lifetime of Wonder “

{Charlie} Ruin Is A Gift

A few weeks back I was sitting in a park sipping on a berry white mocha with a dear friend when she brought up the fact that I no longer write about Charlie. She asked me “Do you not love him anymore AJ? Do you not miss him anymore?” The thing about loss is weContinue reading “{Charlie} Ruin Is A Gift”