Category Archives: Friends Are Like Good Bras

{29} Happy Birthday!

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Me and My Mama at my Birthday Lunch


Wow I can’t believe that I am one year closer to 30. I guess when you have all ready been through a life time of shit it means everything is down hill from here. I may only be 29, however I have lived a life that dreams are made of. Sorrow reminds me that I am human. Each night I ask God to keep my son Alucious close and to make sure Nylan turns out all right. I’ve been a wife, a mother, a best friend, a sister, a paralegal, an advocate, a lobbyist, and now I get to be an auntie to Sophia.

Survivor is a label I wear proudly. I tirelessly advocate for heart health, stroke symptom awareness, and healthy kids. There is one thing I’ve learned : I would trade all of my money in a heart beat if it meant I could have my health back. Money can buy me things that will make me happy. However it cannot buy my health. Wealth is no fun when you do not have health on your side. So take it from me. Take care of yourself. You only have one body, one heart, and in the end money will mean nothing. But your health will mean everything.

I’ve struggled with the fact that my health will never be the same and that this is the body I have to grow old with. My body has brought me to some pretty darn amazing places over the past year. It has brought me to DC, the gulf coast, NYC, and countless other locations. It has allowed me to share my story and save lives. Life is the ultimate gift and I am so very glad God has granted me with one more year upon this earth.

It is my hope that the next year is filled with goodness and big amazing things. If I dare to dream then I can dare live a big meaningful life. People try to knock me down, rip my reputation apart, and spread the words of incapable across the firm. That alone gives me strength to prove that I am 1. a bigger person, 2. a professional, and 3. I will out shine the {redacted}. I have something he will never have and that is class. One can’t lie their way into class. They can only fumble when their lies start to unravel and unravel they will. I may not be there to see it. Yet I will smile silently at his blunder and step over him on my way to the top. The only place I am going is up.

Up. Thats where I am headed. I’ve got two jobs that I love. One requires more effort than the other. A speaking schedule that can’t be beat, a book deal on the table, and well my lawyer tells me we are winning. I’d say that’s some pretty darn awesome sauce. Not to mention this here blog isn’t doing to shabby either. People like to read about my antics, dating blunders, cry with me, and say fuck it. I swear online as I swear in real life. I am nothing but myself and I am human. Humans swear and they like it too!

Fuck it. I am in a relationship with myself. I have no time for dating. I want to but I have no life outside of work. It’s bad my friends have to remind me that we have dinner dates and nights of ninja antics. My goal for year 29 is to work a little less and have what you regular folks call a social life. A social life sounds interesting and wow taking trips for fun sounds like a gosh darn good plan. Who knows maybe there is a man out there who is brave enough to step into my world and take me on. I’m not holding my breath. Thats why I have the muppet to keep me company.

So Ninjas a toast! Goodbye 28 and Hello 29. May year 29 be filled with good friends, endless opportunity, laughter, adventure, and mostly love. Thank you so much for being a part of my life. Each and every one of you means the world to me. Know that I care about you and love you more than you will ever know. Ninjas for ever. May we go down kung fu fighting!

The Best NINJAS Hang Out With God {Remembering Adam Lavasseur}

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Life is a journey worth taking and a dream worth dreaming. One thing I know is that today is for sure and tomorrow is uncertain. None of us know when our name with be called in heaven and when our last moment will be.

Early this morning I got word that I lost a very dear college friend. A man who was literally bigger than life. Someone so pure and kind he set your heart on fire. From the moment I met him a friendship was born and as they say the rest was history.

Adam lived three doors down from me in Ross Hall on the UW-Superior campus. We would sit in the hallway late at night just talking about life and dreaming of our futures. I could hear him cheering loudly from his room on nights the Packers were winning and even louder on the nights that the Vikings were loosing. He would walk with me to class and poke fun at my “old lady parka.” Adam was truly a gift. I am a better person because of Adam and I am thankful to call him my friend.

Part of me is angry with God. I must ask “What makes me different? You saved me, so why didn’t you step in and save Adam?” Maybe this is something I’ll never really understand. People well medical professionals tell me I should be dead and its a mystery on how I survived a massive pulmonary embolism. Losing Adam makes me realize how special life is and that it truly is a gift. We do not have control over our demise. We only have control over what we do with the time we have.

Time is something we have a lot of. Yet, we let that time run through our fingers. Putting off I love you, dates with friends, and for what? That what is work, work always gets in the way of our time. Yet work is something we need to sustain us and keep us a float. Its been a while since I’ve spent time with Adam and I’d give anything to have more time with him. Time, is something we can never get back, no matter how hard we try. We never get a do over. So use your time wisely and spread as much love as you can. Because in the end love is all that matters.

What matters now is that we look deep within our selves and honor Adam. Honor him by extending a smile to a stranger, a hug to a child, and sharing laughter with friends. Adam would want that. This I am sure of. He had so much love in his heart that is was bursting wide open. Adam never cut anyone down, he always saw the good in us and remind us to find the good in others.

My hope is that all of you have an Adam in your lives. Let that person know how much they mean to you and tell them. Because you never know when their last day on earth will be. I have to believe that the best ninjas get to hang out with God. Adam, you my friend were one hell of a Ninja. I will treasure our friendship and miss you deeply. Rest my friend rest on the clouds of heaven.

HTC EVO ~ Ninja BFF Date ~ Ninja Antics and Smaller Pants

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It is well-known that I have a long-standing relationship with my blackberry. Blackberry just wasn’t doing it for me anymore. His keys were getting stuck, the sound went, and shit the dang thing froze all of the time. The curb is where it needed to go. After doing some research and getting advice from my tech ninjas I decided to get the HTC EVO.

Technology and me are like oil and water. Simple is best and sometimes simple isn’t simple enough. If I can turn on a computer I call that a good day. Anyways so far my EVO is doing the trick. I had to teach the darn thing to recognize swear words, it knows plenty now. All versions of Angry Birds have been downloaded, twitter is on the front page, and foursquare works correctly. So far I am loving the thing and haven’t broken or chucked it yet. This, this is big ninjas.

Big Gingers are mighty fine when shared with a Ninja BFF!

The HTC EVO proved to be entertainment for my BFF Ninja dinner date Miss Angela. Lucky for me she figured out how to turn the darn auto correct off. It was driving me nuts. Speaking of nuts, hot damn it is so hard to find a parking spot around Psycho Suzies. That place is always nuts. Lucky for us we got a table right away and had tiki drinks in our hands within minutes of sitting down. Cheese curds and pizza were on tap for the evening. Since it was 100 degrees in there we decided to bolt and head downtown to The Local. Patio seating was available and my oh my the people watching was superb.

Nicollet mall is an interesting run way of sorts for the late night crowd. bachelorette parties ran wild and the cougars were on the prowl. In between checking out the people dessert was had. Ninja BFF dates always end with two things: 1. whiskey and 2. dessert. At The Local they combine the whiskey into dessert so it’s a win win. It was getting late and my date was turning into a pumpkin so we headed home to uptown.

Ultimate Ninja BFF date nights end with dessert!

Uptown is quite the place. My neighbors felt the need to vacuum at 8am. I didn’t appreciate the noise neither did my aching head. Much of Saturday was spent sleeping and running errands. I ran into my ex BFF. Target is no longer my happy place. Jack talked me into meeting up for drinks. Well since I wasn’t on call and after much begging I agreed to hit the town.

Ninja antics ensued as we hopped from bar to bar. Crown and cokes are what I have been drinking lately. A man at the bar told me “I don’t trust girls who drink whiskey. They get crazy.” With that heard I looked the bartender in the eye and said “Crown and Coke sir.” The man next to me: “Shit, and you seemed so normal.” Haha men should never make a comment about a ladies drink of choice. Some of us choose fruity cocktails and others well we go for the hard stuff. No fruit necessary. Soon the evening wore into a blur and I was ready to settle in for the night.

Sunday morning was pretty much a repeat of Saturday. Except for the photo shoot. Man that camera flash hurts the eyes. With the shoot in the bag I headed home to my Mama. Mainly so she could do my laundry. Laundry is important. Since loosing 26 pounds none of my jeans fit and well Rochester has pants lots of pants. I let my mama drive the prius so I could play angry birds on the way down. Priorities I know, there mixed up but hey this was my first time playing angry birds on my new phone. My new pants are a size smaller than the last ones I bought. Go me! I am almost back to my premarriage weight. The ex husband is who I blame for the weight gain and now that he’s gone I am melting like a stick of butter in the hot July sun.

It was a weekend filled with new pants, BFF Ninjas, and to many crown & cokes to count. It was beautiful and a great way to spend my first weekend off in months. Monday always comes to soon. Weekends should be longer and filled with so much love that your heart bursts wide open. Kung fu and ninjas that’s a weekend dreams are made of.

{Judgement} – Open The Book For Once!

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“Don’t Judge a Book By Its Cover. It’s The Story Inside That Counts.”

We live in a day and age where people continue to pass judgement upon one another. You think by now we would have all of our social issues worked out and that we wouldn’t need to treat people like crap. Yet as a society we do.

This didn’t dawn on me until a friend said to me: “AmandaJean you are the first woman to actually treat me like I exist. You don’t look at my weight. You see me as a person.” I lost my kung fu right there on the floor and uttered Shut the front door kid! He went on to explain that he has never had a real girl friend or even a real date. That most of the dates he went on were awkward or out of pity. Pitty is not a reason to date someone. Tears began to fill my eyes. This man is a great catch and deserves to find happiness. He truly deserves to find the one, make those babies, and have the picket fence. I want this for him.

It angers me that people look down upon the overweight. They are people too. Hell when I was in Europe the cathedrals were filled with frescos of women who had back fat and gasp curves. It was in the cathedrals that I personally became ok with having hips and tits. My hips and tits get me lots of places in this world and I am glad to have them on board. Sure I go huff it at the gym just like everyone else and eat mostly organic. But, do we ever stop to think that some people are just built with a smidge of extra love.

Recently a woman was working out next to me. She said to me: ” I want to look like you. You are so skinny.” Trust me, my ass isn’t skinny. I’ve got junk in the trunk and I am ok with it. I quickly said thank you. Took her hand and said “I don’t even know your name, but Babes you are beautiful just the way you are. Do not let anyone tell you any different.” She cried right then and there in the middle of LifeTime fitness. She told me: “No one has ever made me feel so beautiful until now. Thank you, Thank you.” An you can all guess what I said next…..oh yes I pulled the NINJA CARD and she giggled her socks off. Now I’ve got a new friend at lifetime and she is a sweetie that’s for sure. It should be known that I will workout and then treat myself after said workout with a cup cake. Thats how I roll.

Rolling is something we as humans need to do. You’ve gotta roll with the punches and duck from the kicks. Instead of beating one another down, maybe we should try the opposite. Like on Tuesdays we should be nice to each other or hell let’s be nice to each other every day. Yup, I like that idea lets lift each other up every day of the week. Throw back fat, curves, and shit our hips to the side and party like were skinny bitches. Heh, then again the skinny ones are not so fun. I am going with the ones who eat cup cakes after running on a treadmill, those are the real ninjas.

For me Ninjas come in all shapes, sizes, colors, creeds, and gender. Growing up my parents taught us and pounded into us that judgment and hate are bad bad words. Still to this day if I say “Pete I hate the treadmill.” My dad will tell me “Mannie you do not hate, you “dislike” the treadmill. Hate is a sickness and you are not sick.” My father thou a little nutty in his own right is on to something. We are not born to hate and be mean. Hate and meanness are learned traits. Someone had to teach you how to be mean and to hate. Maybe if we stopped the teachers of hate and discrimination our world would be a little brighter.

That is my new goal to stop the hate and get people to really look at one another. To actually see what its like to live in their shoes and to look beyond the flesh that holds the soul. The soul holds the answers, the body is just the vessel that holds it in.

Relationship Advice From The Divorced Girl?

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It amazes me when friends call late at night looking for a kind ear and solid relationship advice. Heck, if I were you I’d be the last person I’d come to for advice. Then again I am known for my blunt, no bull shit, straight from the heart, and tell you like it is advice. You will never get sugar-coating from me.

One thing I can not stand are liars and people who are so fake they make a snake look cool. Be yourself and you can never go wrong. Don’t lie to get someone to like you or to make people think you are better than what you are. Lies start to unravel after a while and you will find yourself drowning alone. An no one wants to be alone. No one likes a person who walks around in a suit when they don’t have to. Maybe that suit makes you feel important, gives you a sense of worth, and protects your secrets from the world. At the end of the day your suit has to come off and the holes in your shoes will collect water. No one likes wet socks, not even me.

Socks are something you should never lose on a first date. It’s ok to giggle your socks off, but never leave them behind. Maybe I am a tad old-fashioned or just a little jaded by my divorce. All to often my male friends call me and say she broke up with me. I kindly ask why knowing full well its 3am and I have to be awake in 2 hours. They tell me what went wrong and usually it ends up with they lost their socks and she walked away. I say hold on to your socks until you build something you can stand on. Then again I didn’t heed my own advice and found myself divorced 6 years later.

Divorce is something I never want to see any of you go through. Trust me no one ever plans on it. People change, things change, and divorce is the only way out. I have seen divorced women who flaunt it like their Mama’s told them not to do and then there are those who cry into their tissues.The same goes for women who are fresh out of a break up. They like divorced women build these walls and start to date like men. Men are an interesting creature. One of these days we will be provided with manuals to figure them out.

Most of my male friends are single. They are the type of man who worked hard to build a career, bought homes/condos, and are over all great catches. Yet their still single. I will point out that most of them are under 5’10”. They are short and for some reason women will not give them the time of day. There is nothing wrong with short men. I tend to date on the shorter side, I don’t try to it just turns out that way. Ladies give the short ones a chance, you will be surprised. Just look past the fact that neither of you will be able to reach things up high and you will be fine.

On the other side of the coin alot of my female friends are young professionals or single mamas. I am the only divorced one in the pack. They often tell me its hard to find a man to put up with their independent crazy work schedule life style. I tell them date up not down. If you date down that person may not understand your schedule and lifestyle. Date someone who can fit into your life and someone who will want to work with you to make those dates. Someone who understands that yup, you may cancel plans last-minute but, you will make up for it later. Heck, he might have to cancel plans and send you flowers the next day to put a smile on your face. Date the person you can’t live without, who cares if he doesn’t fit the mental image of prince charming. Every man deserves a chance to be with a professional woman like you. Go out and make someones day. It doesn’t hurt to grab a drink and have a conversation for a few hours.

Drinks lead to interesting conversations. Yes, I have been drunk dialed by friends and had my door knocked on at 3 am when dates go a rye. Turning them away is not an option. I am not that type of person. I sit with them hand tissue over or utter the words “Its going to get batter. You are an Awesome Ninja. Mr/Ms Right is just hiding on you.” A smile usually breaks when the word Ninja is used and that smile leads to a giggle. Giggles let us know that we are going to be all right and that hey its all part of the game.

So my advice is dust off your dating shoes and try, try, try until something sticks. You are never going to find love if you hide in your office all day. Cruise the streets look for eye candy, talk to a stranger, and be yourself. Invite that coworker you’ve been eyeing to happy hour, ask the barista to dinner, and answer an online ad. So what if they shoot you down. It just means they weren’t worth your time to begin with. So Ninjas what are you going to do? You my friends are going to go get your date on.

Question: “Why Do You Blog?”

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“In this world we are only as good as our word. We must speak the truth and be who we are. If we are anything less than ourselves, anything less than true, then our words will mean nothing in the end.” ~AmandaJean

Some days I feel like I lead a double life. By day I am a passionate paralegal and by night I am simply a blogger. My blog has often been my out let to explore and share myself with the world. People often ask how can you put your health information out there, how can you share so much with people you don’t know? Its getting to the point where people are recognizing me at Target, the sky way, and other places around town. Recognition is welcome, just don’t sneak up on me and scare the crap out of me. I don’t like to be scared.

To answer the question “How can you share such personal information?” The answer is this: When I was first told I had a pulmonary embolism I scoured the internet looking for information and all I could find was info relating to the elderly. I’m not a member of AARP, I was a 27-year-old woman in search of answers. At that moment the mission of my blog changed. I realized that I could educate and promote blood clot awareness. That my struggle would be a key to someone elses survival. Once I made that post about my pulmonary embolism there was no looking back. The same goes for my miscarriage, divorce, and cancer. This……this is my life. By sharing it with you we can find common ground. Ground that we can stand on and learn together what it means to be happy, to be a survivor, and to find ourselves again.

One thing you will not find on my blog are details about my personal life, the name of the company I work for, and details of my pending litigation against a pharmaceutical company. Those are private. After all I have to keep something for myself. Truth be told, I am as single as a $1.00 bill, so I have no relationship to write about. Friends that appear in posts have given me permission to share our adventures, struggles, dreams, and blunders. I am not compensated in any way for my Local Thursday Posts and all opinions of the local companies are my own. I love to share my favorite spots in the Twin Cities and around the midwest with you. A lot of these people built their businesses from the ground up and I want to share their passion. Life is often best enjoyed with friends, traveled with strangers, and dreamed with dreamers.

Dreams are something that no one can ever take from us. This blog has led me to a lot of great places and brought a lot of awesome people in my life. I am thankful for it, yet there are days I want to turn it off. Turn it off so the world around me can be quiet. Then I am reminded that if I turned it off it would be like losing a limb. Have Bear Will travel has become a part of me. You can bet your buttons that I will be blogging when I am 80. Maybe I’ll blog about, flying cars, real life avatars, and my grand children’s hover boards. Hey, it could happen.

I have so much love for all of my readers and followers. You are what inspires me to blog. Knowing that we are growing together and changing the world one day at a time amazes me. After all “Everyone was Kung Fu Fighting, Their Fist were as fast as lightning.”

Silent Thank You

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I highly doubt that you read my blog, my twitter or even the text messages I chuck out there. But this this is for you.

I will never regret what went down between us. For as long as I live I want you to know that you are not in no way in hell the reason I left my marriage. Instead you uttered the words I was longing to hear. You told me that it was ok to walk away. That there is no right or wrong in divorce. Everyone loses. That it was ok to be the one who made the call and walked away first.

You were an example. You survived your divorce and managed to find what made you happy. I think of you from time to time. I hope that you are doing all right and that one day your anger will dwindle. You cannot be angry at me forever. When that day comes I will explain it all to you in person (Its one heck of a story). I chose not to air my divorce and the reasons why I left on my blog for the sake of Nylan. After all this blog and one day book is for him. But you are forever part of the story, of my story that I share on my blog and tell to the people I am motivating.

Judgement calls, life comes down to judgement calls. We can choose to stay or go. To be angry or forgive. We can choose to fight or die. It doesn’t matter what we choose as long as we make that final judgement and call it like we see it.

One day, I have faith that your anger will fade. That you and I can sit down adult to adult and I can tell you the truth. The truth that I have been longing to share with you and one that you need to hear.

Just know that I do not desert the people I care about, even thou we no longer speak I still care. I always have and I always will. Mostly I do not give up on good ninjas like yourself. Mainly because no one has ever given up on me. My hope is that one day I can say “Thank You” to your face.

Ninja Road Trip

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Wine Tasting with my two lovely Ninja BFFS


Every once in a while you’ve just got to dodge out-of-town. Seeing Miss Joy in Green Bay provided to be the perfect option. It has been about a year since I’ve seen my sister from another reservation. Oh, my have I missed her. Joy always keeps me calm and helps me clear the jumbled mess I call a brain.

I took this trip as a fitting opportunity for Angela my newest ninja BFF to meet my dearest ninja BFF. Lucky for me they got along grand and the weekend was filled with goodness. Joy met us at our hotel and tears began to fall as she threw her arms around me. This woman has provided me with more strength that I could ever imagine. She whispered in my ear “Its gonna be all right Mannie.” Those words melted my soul.

Being in the car can make one hungry, like so hungry you would wrestle an alligator and eat it for dinner hungry. Olive Garden was a wise choice and my watermelon martini hit the right spot. Darn that thing was good, I’d go back just for that cocktail.

Watermelon Martini

After lunch we headed over to Cooks Corner the nations largest (that’s their claim) kitchen store. I only have one reason to go here and no it’s not for the awesome cooking gear. They have amazing fudge, yes fudge more flavours than you could ever try. sherbert was their new flavour and it was amazing. Yum! Yum!
As most of you know I am working as a contract paralegal for one of the large firms in town and I have a little inside joke with a coworker. An the joke just got better at the kitchen store. Two words: Gummy Alligator. I was laughing so hard the clerk must have thought I was nuts or drunk. This was one of the most funniest candies I have ever seen and was the perfect gift for the Sherpa.

So with my fudge, gummy alligator and new kitchen finds we set off for the mall. You must know I took Angela to the mall so she could get a boob job. Its true I did. I got her a bra education session, a proper fitting, and her boobs they are pretty darn perky. Angela is now more confident in herself and her boobs stand at attention. Real friends take their friends to get good bras. It’s true they do.

Captains Walk is also the other reason I decided on Green Bay. I love love this winery and their staff is mighty darn fantastic. Plus they know me by name (yup it’s that bad) and their wines can’t be beat. To be honest out of all of the wineries in America Captains Walk is my hands down favorite. I get sad when I run out of their wine, so sad that I have to place my order online and then get carded by the UPS man. Anyways Joy and I helped Angela pick her wines and made sure she had an awesome time.

Soon it was time for Joy to head into work and we were left without a tour guide. Never fear I have a GPS and got around Green Bay just fine. Dinner at Brett Farves steak house was a bust, Applebees had better fair, booze in a bag is handy and our hotel, well we didn’t get mugged.

Since our night was mugging free and our hazemat suits were tucked away we hit the road. The road to Appleton that is. Yes, a visit with Joy almost always involves two things BBQ and red velvet cake. At Famous Dave’s I explained what was going on, my man troubles, I let the C word fly, and advised that I haven’t felt right in a while. This sent Angela and Joy into a game of twenty questions, both decided a ritual of protection was in order.

Supplies were bought, in the circle I sat, and waited for whatever this was to leave. Leave it did and my bad ninja mojo was gone. Replaced by cold, cold, and more cold. I was totally wearing a fleece on a 90 degree day. The day slipped into night and it was time for Angela and I to head home. The trip was way to short.

Drinks, Flats, and Ninja Antics

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I am a firm believer that everything in life no matter good or bad happens for a reason. My last position ended miserably, yet even then I found a piece of silver in the lining. Maybe I was brought there to meet the wonderful Miss. Angela. I am grateful for her friendship and she is quickly becoming one of my favorite BFFs. Yea, Yea I know I’ve got like 300 BFFs. Come on now, every Ninja needs a pack and well my BFFs are my Ninja crew.

Ninjas always travel in pairs. It’s true they do. Friday night we went out to celebrate my new-found employment. I love my job. What can I say its a big giant leap forward from the last joint I worked. Professionalism rules the day and best of all there is no Kansas girl. Thank God for that! An its blissfully quiet no annoying shrill talking about their family in the background, just pure silent bliss. This was worth celebrating. An Celebrate we did. Dinner at Barrio yummy margaritas, The Big Ginger at The Local, and well all evenings must end in cake. Angela was a very good sport, putting up with my ADD brain and the ooo let’s go here, now there mind set.

Saturday morning brought me a nasty surprise. The Prius had a flat. I was on my way into do some work at the firm and didn’t notice that I had a flat tire until I drove half way down the block. Yay for AAA, they came quick, changed my tire and I was on my way. Thanks to the tire protection plan, I didn’t have to pay for the repair. Sadly the tire tech told me that there was a screw in my tire and that I didn’t pick it up on the road. Someone put the screw into the side wall of my tire. What the hell, can’t people just leave things alone. Do you realize how dangerous that could have been if my tire blew while going 70mph? Do you realize I could have been hurt? Thank God I was close to home and only going 20mph when I noticed it. I have a sneaking suspicion of who placed said screw in my tire. On the bright side I didn’t let the flat get me down. Nope not one bit. Tires are fixable, life is to short, and well what goes around comes around.

In deed it does. Life works in mysterious ways. Part of my Saturday plans were tossed because of the tire. Yet, I didn’t let me stop it from my pending Ninja Antics. There is always Ninja time. I had an awesome afternoon teaching a group of kids about CSA’s and helping them plant a community garden. Dirty hands are the best hands to have. It reminds us that we are connected to this earth and that it is a part of us. After the garden was planted, it was time to tackle The Bear at Pizza Luce with friends and sip wine while watching the clouds roll by. This, this is the life. Everything I’ve worked for has finally come to me. Hard work and ninja antics alway pay off in the end.

The Three Fs

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The three Fs help me through every situation and make life worth living. What are they you ask? Its simple: Faith, Family and Friends.

FAITH

I was raised in a primarily Lutheran/Catholic town, with a sprinkle of Methodist. I was part of the sprinkles.

At a young age I learned what God was and how he could either save you or leave you. Mostly I learned that its mind of matter. At the tender age of 4 I understood God and was thankful to him because he, he had saved me so I could play with my Barbie’s.

My Father is the most religious man I know, he can quote the Bible like no buddies business. Yet he has rarely set foot in a church outside of weddings and funerals. He taught me that God Lives in our hearts, not in the brick and mortar that we flock to. That God is in the water, the air, the trees, he is in everything. I just had to open my eyes and listen. On the other hand my Mom made sure we went to church every Sunday, minus my Father, he was allowed to stay home and watch GI Joe. ( I was mad because I loved that cartoon and didn’t get to watch it) Instead I had to wear a stuffy itchy dress and sit in church, all while knowing GI Joe was on at home.

GI Joe would be the least of my worries in life. I have come to find my spiritual self. My faith is strong and its something I have mish mashed together. Combining the spiritual beliefs of my Ojibway side and mixing it with a sprinkle of Methodist. I just call my concoction Faith so strong it sets your heart on fire. Honestly, I know God exist, in those dark quite times, he’s there with us and when the sun shines he whispers in our ear “Go Ninja Go!”

FAMILY

What can I say I love my family through and through. They are my foundation, my base, an anchor to my soul. My Mama tells me “I didn’t raise you, you….you raised yourself. Your father and I were just lucky enough to be along for the ride.” Its true I did practically raise myself with their help of course. I listen to their advice, heed their warnings, and do what I want regardless. They pick me up when I fall and cheer me on as I rise.

My Mama is one of the most courageous women I know. She came from a poor farm family of 10 kids, they had nothing. Yet, she had a desire to create something better, to do better, and be better. My Mother she…she was one of the first women in Minnesota to hold a heavy equipment drivers license. Yup, she was! She was a first and she drove that dump truck better than a man ever could. She always told me that women can do what ever they want in life. An to never let a MAN tell you, you can’t. Because you can. My Mama has had many careers in her life which lead her from the coal yard, to health care and eventually the kitchen. She no longer drives a dump truck, hasn’t done it in years, today she’s wielding a tongs and shouting orders in the kitchen.

Now my Daddy he’s like a cat! The man has 9 lives, nothing can get him down. Its funny I don’t call my Father, Dad. I call him Pete. Pete isn’t even his real name, but to me he is and always will be Pete. My father is some what of a legend in Red Wing. I’m not sure if any of the old stories are true. However I am certain that he had to do something pretty good to earn the nick name “The Animal.” I’ve seen men quake in their boots at his meer presence in a grocery store, the gas pump and so on. If only they saw him today, he is a shadow of his former self. I got two things from Pete, My curly hair and my A.D.D “its a family tradition.”

When I was a little girl Pete would take me fishing, we never caught anything, yet I cherish those moments and memories that he gave me. I learned everything I know about trimming trees, growing plants, and orchards from my Father. Those are handy skills to have. Unlike most Fathers, Pete took an active role in raising my sister and I. He was a stay at home Dad. My mama she wore the pants, brought home the bacon and Pete, well he cooked it. Watered down Koolaide and steak were his dinner specialties. Winter was never his thing, spring and summer where the seasons he cherished. On cool summer nights he’d let us sit in the back of the old Ford pick up truck as he drove through the countryside, the breeze whipping my curls as I slurped my slushy. Nothing mattered, it was just me, Pete, and my dreams.

They say a parents success in life is judged by the success of their children. I’d say my parents are pretty darn succesful and I’ve got the ninja skills to prove it!

FRIENDS

Life is more fun when spent with friends. Friends come and go, but they always leave an impression on your soul. I have more BFFs than I can count and love every single one of my friends like family. They keep me sane, listen to me whine, and laugh when I fall. They only laugh because I probably tripped over a crack or something. We dry each others tears, live like were dying and laugh until our stomachs hurt. It’s nice to know that I’ve got friends all over the globe and that no matter where I go, I always have a place to stay. My BFF Joy said it best “Know that no matter where you go in this world, what happens, and what you do, you always have a home with me.”

I hope you have the three Fs in your life. Without the three Fs life isn’t a journey worth taking. If you lose faith, just remember that deep inside there is a ninja and when you don’t think you can go on. Slip on your suit, let that ninja take over, and let your kung fu fly. Lean on your family, if you don’t like your family make your own. I hope you have more friends than you will ever need in this world. Friends truly make this place brighter.